Thursday, March 17, 2011


My rainbow of fluff

     I was looking around today, feeling pretty proud of myself at all I accomplished on this lovely day, and I started thinking of a conversation I had with my mom a few weeks ago.  I can't remember if it was something I had read or heard, but it was about how you shouldn't focus on just telling your kids how proud you are of them, but also telling them that they should be proud of themselves.  Somewhere in the conversation my mom asked me if I was proud of myself.  I didn't even have to hesitate before I said yes.  These are just a few reasons why you should also be proud of yourself (and feel free to shout it out loud, except if you are reading this right after I post it because it is really late and you will probably wake the kiddos up :-)

You should be proud if:
- You are currently doing something in your life that you have chosen to do because it makes you happy.
- You are doing something differently then how you were raised (be proud for taking a chance)
- You completed at least one thing on your to do list today
- You saved even $0.10 at the store, we all have to start somewhere
- Your kids are happy
- You are happy
- You still have dreams you want to follow
- You are a parent
- Fill in the blank

     I am proud of myself because I am doing things as a parent that my parents didn't do.  I am changing it up and forging a new path.  I am proud because I am part of a loving marriage and we have known each other (and been married) for almost 7 years now.  I am proud because we have raised a loving, considerate and super smart little boy.  I am proud because I know I can do whatever I put my mind to, I have definitely proven that to myself during the past year and a half.  I am proud to know I am raising Sweet Pea the way that works best for her and not necessarily because that is how I did it for Wild Man.
     What makes you proud of yourself?  Just thinking of some of the people who read this blog, I can already think of reasons they should be proud of themselves.  For example, raising a daughter on your own without much help from her father is a major reason to be proud of yourself.  Staying sane with 4 kids 4 years old (almost 5 years old) and under is a great reason to give yourself props.  Starting a blog in order to help other mothers feel better about themselves is a reason to be proud of yourself.

     I think as moms, or women in general, we have a hard time accepting compliments.  I know it is something I have had to work on.  I always felt like I needed to rack my brain to come up with a great compliment to give the person back.  On top of that, we are so hard on ourselves because we read so much into everything.  We feel that any little flaw or slip up can reflect badly on us.  I know I have to constantly remind myself that there are certain things that Wild Man is going to do that is just due to his age (and being a boy).  It doesn't necessarily reflect how I parented.  Does that mean that I don't notice the looks from other parents or citizens if they don't agree with what he is doing?  I do, but I also feel that if they truly understood children, they would understand.  Some kids are going to take things from other kids.  Some are going to be bossy.  Some kids will throw temper tantrums.  I am just proud of myself for taking a step back and realizing this.  Heck, I was proud of myself at the grocery store because I got both kids through (Sweet Pea chose to stay awake) with no major meltdowns until we were paying.

     So, my challenge to you is to tell yourself, and us, what makes you proud of yourself.  If that seems difficult, start with making a list of the things you got done today, even if it is only that you got your teeth brushed.  On top of this challenge, next time you want to tell someone you are proud of them, try rewording it to "Aren't you proud of yourself" or "You should be proud of yourself".  You will be surprised at how taken aback, and then how happy someone (even a kid) is to hear that.  It really makes them think.

     Now that you have read this blog and passed it on to someone else, aren't you proud of yourself?  ;-)

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